"Sculptors of Illusions"
If you take time to read this and
understand it, I feel it will make you
very adept at lessening stress and feeling
at home in this world.
Most of our problems come from thinking
others feel like we do. They probably don't.
Each of us creates an illusion of life. We have
rules and expectations based on what we think is
right or comfortable for us. We love those who we
think believe as we do and we reject those who don't.
We assume those we let into our lives really experience
life as we do. They do not. They have their illusions
of life and are probably so far from ours that we would
be shocked if we could experience it. This is why people
divorce. At some point they discover that truth.
We work to create the "life" that we want and are comfortable
with. Our biggest mistake is to think others feel like we do.
We project our thoughts and feelings towards them and if they
don't argue, we assume.
Only God knows what they are thinking.
People will stay in your life for various reasons. It is comfortable,
they receive things they want from you, you are amusing or sexy
or fun to be with, lots of reasons. This is no reason for you to ever
believe that they experience your life as you do.
I remember a time when I was pouring out my feelings to my
husband. When I was finished he said, "Tomorrow I am going
to fix that trellis by the garage".
He was nowhere in my experience
of those painful moments.
He was living in his own illusion.
So you see, there is an illusion for every living being.
This is why there is so much
stress, pain, illness, wars, killings,
you name it.
It is because we think
people are like we are.
They are not.
It is like living in a world of aliens.
The more we fool ourselves,
the more stress we bring into our lives.
When people don't show appreciation,
it is because what you do
really has no meaning to them.
Perhaps they didn't even want you to say
or do or give them the "sacrifice"
that you made.
Perhaps they really don't even like you,
but just tolerate you
because they are related,
work with you,
or
just can't figure out how to dump you.
In order to cope with this thinking,
you must give up your ego totally.
At first it will be hard,
but it will bring you much peace
in the long run.
I have a strong belief in God
and the Christian doctrine
and in my "illusion"
I used to become very angry
when someone would deny God.
Like I could do anything about that
except become stressed?
People who want a nice illusion
that makes them comfy probably don't want
any reminders of right and wrong.
Maybe it is too hard for them
to live under that strain.
I don't know and no longer stress myself
with the problem.
It is their God given right
to choose anything
they want for their life.
That is another thing
that is hard for parents
to understand.
We tend to think
we "own" our children.
What a stupid idea that is.
The more we want them to be like us,
the more they fight for their own rights.
Simple when you know the truth.
When we really fall in love
with someone,
and it isn't returned,
we get all sorts of emotions going on.
Now isn't that stupid?
If they don't feel the same,
all the wishing,
manipulation, etc;
isn't going to change it.
If they do come into your life
just because it is easy
or they have ulterior motives,
you will be very sorry in a short time.
Knowing this theory
helps you understand
why some people chose a life of crime,
some kill the victim who
won't live in their illusion.
Some steal to create a materialistic illusion
that they think they should have.
Every thing we do,
every thought we have
just belongs to us.
You can be judged good or bad
by others no matter what you do,
or choose to drive,
sit on, food you eat,
I could go on forever with examples.
You can imagine what others
are thinking but you will never know
or experience just what it is like
where they live,
even in the same house.
Even in the same room.
I don't know why knowing this
is so freeing but it is.
When something goes wrong,
you find yourself thinking,
well I am glad I am not in his "world".
Never force yourself into
someone else's world either.
You will be very unhappy.
The forces will collide.
Just make yours as comfy as possible
and allow others to do the same.
You will no longer be plagued
by second guessing,
expectations that never come to fruition,
disappointments,
and other painful stress agents.
When a catastrophe occurs,
you will have the energy to cope
and re-invent your illusion
to suit your comfort and your state of mind.
You will no longer worry
about events that you can do nothing about.
You WILL
find peace at last!
Kesti©November 2, 2009
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