'Depression’

'Depression’

Take me back to my illusions

When I thought I was special

When I thought I was needed

When I thought I was doing the right things

When I thought I knew God.

When I thought that if you did it right

it would turn out all right.

When old age seemed remote.

When I got excited about baby birds.

When I thought dogs were necessary.

When I thought I looked kinda cute.

When commercials didn’t aggravate me.

When I saw a sparkle in my love’s

eyes when he saw me.

When it was fun to cook and bake.

When I brought flowers into the house.

When I loved to go shopping.

When mushrooms that popped up

in the yard overnight

sent me running for my camera.

When I cared if my car was clean.

When I used to put on makeup every day.

When I enjoyed going to the theatre.

When I actually planned to bake an apple pie.

When I loved to laugh.

When I didn’t feel all sad and lonely inside.

When I had energy to burn.

When I could run with ease.

When I got down on the floor

to play with kids.

When I thought a rainbow was a special miracle

When seeing a bluebird made my day.

When going on vacation

wasn’t a killing proposition.

When I still needed things to buy.

When renting a movie was a big deal.

When washing my car was fun.

When I enjoyed dancing.

When a nap refreshed me.

When I gave fresh baked goods

to my neighbors for no reason.

When I could write with enthusiasm

and enjoyed reading the finished article.

I think I am dead...

Kes 2009